Winter Plans

I'm not sure how to title this post or exactly what to say as there's still a lot unknown but I'll share anyway. For a few weeks I've been given a little bit of direction for when to move on and what to do.  At the beginning when people would ask how long I was in California I'd say, 'at least til Christmastime and after that I'm not sure' and that was okay for a little bit but soon before my visit to Indiana at the end of September I started seeking for more specific direction and felt a peace about staying here until Christmas and going home after that.  To what and for what I wasn't exactly sure.  Then during my time up in Michigan out of the blue Maria asked me my plans for after the New Year and so I started going into some things I was thinking about and she patiently listened to me ramble and sort things out.  Since it was obvious that I had no set plan, she asked me if I'd consider moving in with her and Jim to nanny Calvin for a few months since they both work and go to school. 

A year ago I never would've guessed I'd become a nanny.  There's a lot of things happening in my life I never would've guessed, but anyway, nanny-ing is just one of those things that never really appealed to me.  Don't get me wrong, I like toddlers and young kids, but all day every day is not my idea of the perfect job. Also I had been picturing myself moving home not just to the Midwest. Yet God has given me an excitement for this next phase and I'm looking forward to the time I'll have to nanny my darling nephew.  I mean, who wouldn't want to see this happy face every day?

What a ham. Oh, but how I love that ham. 

There are two cons: it will be winter in Michigan (coming from winter in LA) and I don't know how long I'll be there except that it will be between two and four months.  After all this you're probably thinking, that's it?  And yep, it is.  I can assure you that at times it could really stress me out that
once again I'm a frog just hopping from lily pad to lily pad.  Sometimes I want to just find a job and be a 'normal' working person while other times it scares me as change has become normal and I wonder if I could adjust to so much responsibility and not so much variation. But God is not the author of fear, and He has showed me in incredible ways this past year that He has a plan for my life.  A good plan.  Also I've had to remember lately that His ways are different than ours and so many times I think I know what I want but really it turns out far from what it appeared to be.  The fact that God knows me better than I know myself and is in control is such a comfort that I keep going back to.  There are moments when I think forward to March or April and think, 'what's my plan if Jim and Mia don't need me anymore?'  But then I can relax knowing that God has provided in the past and will continue to provide even when I don't know how.  After all, aren't we asked to walk by faith?

In the meantime, I've come to really appreciate this time I've had in Altadena growing, learning, being part of a small church, and strengthening relationships with family that I never spent much time with before. God has definitely had a purpose for this time here and I'm grateful for the blessings I've experienced so far.

Hopefully that catches you up a little on my journey. And that's exactly what it is. A journey. Sometimes I get too focused on the destination as I mentioned with fears of not knowing what's out there, but it's about the getting there. Aren't we blessed to have God as our guide???